Ode to Jack Rabbit: The Cadillac of Vibes
by Doreen Orsini

     It seems only fair that my first review be an ode to my all-time favorite toy, Jack Rabbit. Jack has been my electronic boyfriend/lover/substitute-hubby for years. When times are rough, I turn to Jack for comfort. When an argument leads to someone sleeping on the couch (never me!), Jack is always there to fill that empty spot in bed. Sometimes, Jack joins the hubby and me to help spice up the night. Sometimes, he takes up the slack when hubby and I are not as well in sync as we'd like to be...

     My soon-to-be-released EC book, TANNER'S ANGELS, revolves around a woman who is convinced no man can best Jack, her favorite toy.

     Jack Rabbit, this one's for you.

With slender ears that flutter there
or anywhere that one might dare
A nose that buzzes until you scream
A toy I'm sure will make you cream

I met Jack Rabbit long ago
While shopping for a gift for Flo
Poor Flo got flowers, I got Jack
One night with him, no turning back

You say a bunny riding what?
A penis with a face...why not?
And ladies, he must hold on tight
That penis sways from left to right!

Ok, I lied, it swirls around
Hits each hot spot in Gina Town
Your G-spot doesn't stand a chance
Once you get Jack and drop your pants

Did I forget that while Jack swirls
He'll show you why we all love pearls
Inside a sack they start to race
Against lips that don't grace your face

To those who say they love the rocket
It's in the rabbit's special pocket
To buzz your nub and move those ears
and give you orgasms that make you shed tears

Lover, boyfriend, or hubby might
Try to best Jack; what a sight!
He'll fail, you know, so hold his hand
Remind him that he's just a man.

     I have tried many spin-offs of the Jack Rabbit and even some that are the new advanced version. I have to admit, the original Jack Rabbit is by far the best one.

Product Specs:
Insertable Length: 5.5 inches
Diameter: 1.5 inches
Materials: Various, no information on phthalate content
Price: Varied
Purchase and more info:
somethingsexyplanet.com/cart/viewitem.cfm/5025/All-New-Waterproof-Jack-Rabbit

Doreen Orsini is the author of two books soon to be released from Ellora's Cave. To learn more about her, visit www.doreenorsini.com.